Upgraded

Ok, the vicodin kicked in and I decided it’d be a good time to try to upgrade the site to WordPress 2.0.3 … need to play around with some themes to find one we like. And find updated plugins for stuff like the image browser, etc.

Next time…

Next time I break my nose playing hockey (tho with luck, there won’t be a next time), I won’t wait 4 yrs to get it fixed. The surgery today went fine, but when I hear the doc say at the conclusion of the procedure that “it was one of the most difficult/complex septoplasties she’s ever done” it make me feel stupid for waiting this long. I hope it all heals properly this time w/o any complications or ‘gotchas’.

OMFG…..ouch.

Just call me Rainbow Bright

…and hazy. Because that’s what I’m starting to look like. And feel like, thanks to the Vicodin. I’m not a HUGE fan of The Vicodin…it takes a pretty good dose of it (like, double), for it to do what it’s supposed to on me, but wow, I needed it.

I never knew the human body could produce so very MANY shades of pink, purple and red but at this very moment my entire right side, from armpit to hip, looks like a lovely plate of mixed berries. It is truely awesome. I would take a picture and post it, but that would be, just…too….um….gross. And just think, in a few days there will be yellow, green and brown to throw into the mix.

List of injuries:
*Moderate bruising to the top of right hand (takes up half my hand on the pinkie side)…cause; t-post, I think.
*6 long, deep scratches and one triangular skin flap (that required debriding and sutures…AWESOME!) to right inner arm, below elbow…cause; barbed-wire
*Severe abrasions and skin tears (thank god they did not require sutures), massive central hematoma and surrounding bruising approximately 10in long x 8in wide …cause; barbed wire and t-post
* Beautiful 5in x 4in hematoma on upper right theigh, matching 4in x 5in slightly less colorful bruise on upper right calf…cause; t-post and possibley Jack’s right rear hoof.
* Lovely goose-egg with a nice little abrasion on left upper SKULL…cause; pavement, I think.
* Strained, thank god it wasn’t torn or otherwise mutilated, left lateral cruciate lig. and a pulled hamstring…cause; hyperextension of left knee whilst coming out of saddle, or possibley on contact with the ground. Who the fuck knows on that one.
* A fine collection of misc. scrapes and bruises…cause; the ground, at high velocity.

Did I mention that all those barbed-wire injuries were accomplished whilst STILL CLINGING TO THE GALLOPING HORSE??? Yeah, we covered about 3 t-posts worth of barbed wire before I came completely out of that crappy ass saddle. That’s where the phrase “fucking ouch” comes into play. Barbed wire standing still is no fun, but at a high rate of speed, really nasty.

Conclusion?
1. The further from 16 years old you get, the less you bounce.
2. Get a fucking riding helmet.
3. Get a better saddle, one that is a little more secure.
4. Dogs stay CONFINED when I go riding, from now on, no exceptions.
5. I will never NEVER never consider a career as an action hero, too painful.
6. I will be grateful EVERY day, that this wasn’t worse. No brain damage, no broken bones, no barb wire to the face (that was a very near miss, I saw it go flying by, very close to my eyeballs) and no being drug upsidedown from a stirrup for a mile or so. I was extremely fortunate.

Monday was spent in a Vicodin stupor. Today, I was guilted into going into work. I guilted them by hobbling around like a complete gimp(not difficult, considering the amount of pain I was in today, seriously) and showing them all my bruised right side, twice. Once when I got there and once before the rest of them went home. It was gross. They needed to see it. Bastards. Now, where’s my Vicodin? Maybe by tomorrow I’ll be able to reach things on the ground again. I better, because Art’s having his nasal roto-rooting tomorrow, and it’s going to be my turn to take care of him. Gawd help us both if I’m not fully functional by tomorrow evening! What a mess we are this week!!

Live entertainment at the ER

Who knew that ERs now come with live entertainment to pass the hours of waiting for tests to be run and such?

Whilest we we waiting, the aforementioned young dude in the wheelchair with the veritable posse of hotties ended up in the other half of the room. The girls all seemed to be fawning over him and basically feeling sorry for him. Until the parents showed up – then they all were escorted out by the nurses and the entertainment began…

First the kid (we’ll refer to him as Butthead) started arguing with his folks over their being critical of him doing this to himself again. Again? Does he make a habit of hurting himself for sympathy? Well, to make a long story short, he broke not one, but both ankles … “in a weird place that you don’t normally see a fracture” (trans: hard to break, hard to heal). He did this by, get this, >roof jumping<. Apparently he and his buds thought it'd be cool to toss Butthead of some roof to see if he could land like a cat. Well, after 6-7 times, his luck ran out and he landed wrong and *SNAP*. We almost burst out laughing as we heard the story from the other side of the curtain. No wonder why the folks were being critical - inside they were probably in turmoil over coming to the realization that they've raised, almost to adulthood (tho, he's got one more year - no telling what he'll do to himself in that year) a bonafide idiot for a son. We got the context on the "again' reference as they were getting ready to release him (after splinting both ankles and telling him to find an orthopedist in the morning) and it turns out the wheelchair he was in was his own. He got it when he broke his collarbone earlier this year - probably under similarly stupid, but yet highly entertaining, circumstances. Ah to be 17 again...

The ER on a Sunday nite

As nites go for visits to the emergency room, Sunday nite is probably not a bad choice. Much fewer accidents and sheer incidents of stupidity on Sundays than Thu/Fri/Sat for example (more on this later).

Got Lisa into the ER at Valley Medical in Pleasanton and it was refreshingly empty. Except for some young dude and a gaggle of teenage hotties. Not sure what he did, but he was in a wheelchair. We’ll get back to him… its a good story. Lisa got checked in and they got her onto a gurney and started to piece her back together. Well, ok, not like there were any pieces hanging off, but it sounds better. It ended up taking from around 10pm to 2:30am to get everything done – 3 stitches in her arm, and an x-ray of her knee (nothing broken – just strained/hyper-extended). The ER doc/tech was pretty funny and overall, it was probably one of the least stressful nites in emergency that I can recall.

A tentanus shot, a knee brace, and a prescription for vicodin later, they sent us on our way.

If you’re ever injured in the east bay, I’d highly recommend this place …

911 – victim of budget cutbacks?

Its either budget cutbacks or they’re just plain incompetent. As I was driving Lisa to the hospital last nite, I called 911 to find the location of the nearest ER (yea, I know – moving to a new area, scoping out the nearby hospitals and such should have been one of the first things to do last year). I had to dial several times, as I kept getting a recording that said “all of our operators are busy – please call back or stay on the line for the next available operator”. This part, I attribute to budget cutbacks.

After the 3rd attempt, I got a live human – from the CA highway patrol – great I think – these folks can tell me exactly the shortest way to get to the ER. We were looking for one in Dublin or Pleasanton, because its closer than going down into Fremont. So, I make my inquiry and get the following responses:

  • Um… I’m not sure, let me think
  • How about Milpitas?
    (FYI – Milpitas is like 20 miles south)
  • Do you want an ambulance? maybe they could meet you at the end of your road
    and they’ll know where the hospital is…

    And finally:

  • I don’t know the area – we’re from Contra Costa county (next county north). How about calling 411 and asking them?
  • What the hell? Doesn’t CHP have a friggin’ web browser in front of them? Or better yet, since they probably get this question >EVERY DAY< , how about a list of this info for each county? Damn good thing it wasn't life threatening. I'm going to make my own list of the local hospitals and put the phone #s in my cell. As an aside, I ended up calling 411 and they found the phone # of the hospital and dialed it for me. The auto-teller answered and told me if it was an emergency, to please call 911...

    A not so pleasant end to the weekend

    Ugh – so, Lisa decided to take Jack out for a ride Sunday evening about 30 mins before sunset while I finished up some work on yet more parts of the sprinkler system. Looked like all was well and everyone was having fun (perhaps except for the hounds, who were told to lie down on the lawn and be good rather than following her out for the ride). Well, on the way back up the driveway, there was a small deer that wandered up and was eating. Lisa stopped and called out wondering what to do with the deer. The dogs who had watched the deer earlier and then focused on Lisa coming up the driveway, bolted away from where they were sitting near me and took out after the deer. The deer freaked, tried to jump the fence, failed and the dogs were trying to get it as it was flailing. It got up and bolted toward Lisa & Jack. Jack, seeing a crazed deer with two greyhounds in pursuit, wanted none of this and turned to run. In the process of turning/running, Lisa came out of the saddle and went tumbling down onto the side of the driveway and into the fence. Fortunately, she missed being impaled on any of the posts. She did bang her head, wrench a knee and got scraped/cut up when she hit some of the barbed wire.

    An awful way to finish an otherwise good weekend. Next up – visit to the ER…

    Passing thru…

    So, one of my friends from high school, Dawn, her Mom and two little boys Gabriel and Michael stopped by this weekend. Dawn is in the process of moving back to NJ for awhile (from Arlington, WA) where she’s been along with her husband (who’s in the Navy). He got redeployed to Bahrain for the next year+ and seeing how the Middle East is sort of not a great place for American civilians to be in general, much less a woman with two kids, she’s moving back in with the ‘rents for the duration. She is taking the opportunity during this move to show the boys as much of the West as possible, so they’re stopping at Sequoia NF, Vegas, Grand Canyon, and of course, Ranch de Stine 🙂

    We went with them to Bucks in Woodside – a fine fixture of ecceltic Americana, not to mention good food.