Peeve #147, Short List:
NOBODY. FLIPPING. CARES. about your oversized hobby oriented clan. Okay, well, in a morbid way I do. So here’s the rundown on a statement posed to me re: this photo when I posted it to MyFaceSpaceBook page.
“I always go by the standard question: what would they do in the wild?”
Good question. Here’s my vaguely but brutally thought out answer;
Well, the first to go would be the small dog at the end. Daisy is gator-bait. Then Jesus and Diego would perish mindlessly chasing their soccer ball into a deadly ravine lurking with tigers, badgers and one very angry mongoose. Dad would be… beaten to death by the natives for wearing his hat sideways like a retard, which signifies mental weakness and necessitates culling to avoid spreading those genes. Mom would be caught unawares by some wild animal whilst rummaging thru her oversized purse for a tic tac and a Valium. Mayra will survive, but only after being found malnourished, curled up shivering in the fetal position in the back of some smelly bone littered bear cave after a mere 3 hour separation from the rest of her ultimately doomed and quickly defeated clan.
Call me horrible, but everytime I see one of these stupid ‘family ID stickers’ (always ALWAYS on a stupid SUV, by the way) it makes me want to whip out one of those super-sharp putty blades and just scrape all that narcissistic crap into a gooey little poo-pile of vinyl sticker waste.
My current fav is the family of 6 all sporting hula skirts, toting surfboards and wearing big hibiscus flowers on their heads. Guess who went to Hawaii everybody, bet you can’t guess?!? Makes me want to paste on a tall Honolulu trany street walker next to Dad and a big fangy hammerhead shark behind little Billy. And a weasel humping their sad ratty little excuse for a dog.
Okay, back to your regular programing.